One Art by Elizabeth Bishop

The art of losing isn't hard to master;
so many things seem filled with the intent
to be lost that their loss is no disaster.

Lose something every day. Accept the fluster
of lost door keys, the hour badly spent.
The art of losing isn't hard to master.

Then practice losing farther, losing faster:
places, and names, and where it was you meant
to travel. None of these will bring disaster.

I lost my mother's watch. And look! my last, or
next-to-last, of three loved houses went.
The art of losing isn't hard to master.

I lost two cities, lovely ones. And, vaster,
some realms I owned, two rivers, a continent.
I miss them, but it wasn't a disaster.

---Even losing you (the joking voice, a gesture
I love) I shan't have lied. It's evident
the art of losing's not too hard to master
though it may look like (Write it!) like disaster.

iTunes Playlist

So Sorry (Feist)
Your Song (Kate Walsh)
Tiger, My Friend (Psapp)
Sea Legs (The Shins)
Gamble Everything (Ben Lee)
World Spins Madly On (The Weepies)
Fresh Feeling (The Eels)
Please Please Please (The Shout Out Louds)
Rally (Phoenix)
I'm the Man Who Loves You (Wilco)
Your Sweet Voice (The Reindeer Section)
Ice Age (Pete Yorn)
Set Adrift on Memory (PM Dawn)
Bitter (Jill Sobule)
Say it Right (Nelly Furtado)
Sweet Escape (Gwen Stefani)

Mark 10:26-31

26 And they were astonished out of measure, saying among themselves, Who then can be saved?

27 And Jesus looking upon them saith, ^aWith men it is impossible, but not with God: for with God all things are ^bpossible.

28 Then Peter began to say unto him, Lo, we have left all, and have followed thee.

29 And Jesus answered and said, Verily I say unto you, There is no man that hath left house, or brethren, or sisters, or father, or mother, or wife, or children, or lands, for my sake, and the gospel’s,

30 But he shall receive an ^ahundredfold now in this time, houses, and brethren, and sisters, and mothers, and children, and lands, with persecutions; and in the world to come eternal life.

31 ^aBut many that are ^bfirst shall be last; and the last first.

TO DO: May

This is my to-do list for the rest of the month of May:

• Watch Pirates of the Caribbean 2 & 3
• Finish Acts (in the New Testament)
• Finish Harry Potter 6
• Clean my room
• Go to the Temple
• Pay my parking ticket...
  

LOLCAT of the day

Acts 2:42

And they continued stedfastly in the apostles' doctrine and fellowship, and in breaking of bread, and in prayers.

I am reading the Acts immediately after having read the four gospels, and it is tremendous to see the power of the association the disciples have with the apostles. And how humbling it is to realize that we can enjoy that same doctrine and fellowship today - through the words of our living prophets and through the opportunity we have to pray and partake of the Sacrament each week.

John 3:30

He must increase, but I must decrease.

Quote of the Day

I see when men love women. They give them but a little of their lives. But women when they love give everything.
Oscar Wilde

LOLCAT of the Day

Aunt-dom continued

Here is a pretty cute picture of Grandpa & Brady:I get to hold him, too:

It's great being an aunt!

Matthew 9:36-38

But when he saw the multitudes, he was moved with compassion on them, because they fainted and were scattered abroad, as sheep having no shepherd.
Then saith he unto his disciples, The harvest truly is plenteous, but the labourers are few;
Pray ye therefore the Lord of the harvest, that he will send forth labourers into his harvest.

LOLCAT of the Day

Joe Heller by Kurt Vonnegut

True story, Word of Honor:
Joseph Heller, an important and funny writer
now dead,
and I were at a party given by a billionaire
on Shelter Island.
I said, "Joe, how does it make you feel
to know that our host only yesterday
may have made more money
than your novel Catch-22
has earned in its entire history?"
And Joe said, "I've got something he can never have."
And I said, "What on earth could that be, Joe?"
And Joe said, "The knowledge that I've got enough."
Not bad! Rest in Peace!"

The New Yorker, May 16, 2005

Quote of the Day

A true gentleman is one who is never unintentionally rude.
Oscar Wilde

LOLCAT of the Day

Flickrvision

My brother just sent me this site:

http://flickrvision.com/

I find it fascinating!

More pictures of Brady

This is Brady in the nursery. He had to stay on antibiotics for awhile because of the trauma of the birth and because Laura is a carrier of Strep B.

I believe he is coming home today !!!

Isaiah 11:2-3

2 And the ^aspirit of the LORD shall rest upon him, the spirit of ^bwisdom and ^cunderstanding, the spirit of ^dcounsel and might, the spirit of knowledge and of the fear of the LORD;

3 And shall make him of quick understanding in the fear of the LORD: and he shall not ^ajudge ^bafter the sight of his eyes, neither reprove after the hearing of his ears:

David Copperfield (1999)

My parents bought the BBC production of David Copperfield a few years ago, and it has become a family favorite. It features Maggie Smith, Bob Hoskins, Daniel Radcliffe, and Ian McKellen. (Many of the actors/actresses are also in the Harry Potter movies.)

The movie inspired me to read the book, which thus far is my favorite Dickens novel.

It's 185 minutes total (2 episodes).

2 Nephi 9:50-52

Come, my brethren, every one that thirsteth,
come ye to the waters;
and he that hath no money, come buy and eat;
yea, come buy wine and milk without money and without price.

Wherefore, do not spend money for that which is of no worth,
nor your labor for that which cannot satisfy.
Hearken diligently unto me,
and remember the words which I have spoken;
and come unto the Holy One of Israel,
and feast upon that which perisheth not,
neither can be corrupted,
and let your soul delight in fatness.

Behold, my beloved brethren,
remember the words of your God;
pray unto him continually by day,
and give thanks unto his holy name by night.
Let your hearts rejoice.

Quote of the Day

And the turtles, of course... All the turtles are free - As turtles and, maybe, all creatures should be.
Dr. Suess

LOLCAT of the day

There is a curious paradox

There is a curious paradox that no one can explain
Who understands the secret of the reaping of the grain
Who understands why spring is born out of winter's laboring pain
Or why we must all die a bit before we grow again.
I do not know the answer. I only know it's true.
I hurt them for that reason, and myself a little bit, too.
The Fantasticks

A weekend for the Ages

So this last weekend was, in the words of a good friend of mine,

epic

(to say the least.)

1. My friend Christina came into town to visit - we did some sightseeing in San Francisco and we saw Spiderman 3. This is me outside of the theatre, trying to steal Homer's movie candie... without success...
2. Saturday, I got my hair cut. Yes, I know, I'm kind of a big deal.
3. Sunday, I became officially single again :) ... :( .... :)

All this was just the preamble to my aunt-dom, which began on Tuesday!!!

Mary Poppins

I thought this was pretty funny :) I saw this the same day I bought the Mary Poppins DVD...

Quote of the Day

"I have heard there are troubles of more than one kind. Some come from ahead and some come from behind. But I've bought a big bat. I'm all ready you see. Now my troubles are going to have troubles with me!"
Dr. Suess

2 Nephi 32:9

"But behold, I say unto you that ye must pray always, and not faint; that ye must not perform any thing unto the Lord save in the first place ye shall pray unto the Father in the name of Christ, that he will consecrate thy performance unto thee, that thy performance may be for the welfare of thy soul."

LOLCAT of the Day

Isaiah

"And I will bring the blind by a way that they knew not;

I will lead them in paths that they have not known:

I will make darkness light before them,

and crooked things straight.

These things will I do unto them, and not forsake them."

Isaiah 42:16

I love the words of Isaiah. I really cannot express enough the beauty of the Messianic scriptures we can find there. We have a loving Savior and Redeemer and we can know him better through these passages. Sometimes it can be hard to understand or connect with the idea that Jesus Christ and his Atonement are both very real, but in studying Isaiah, I know that I have reached a greater understanding of Jesus Christ's love for me - and have reached a greater threshold of faith.

"And the Lord shall guide thee continually,
and satisfy thy soul in drought,
and make fat thy bones:
and thou shalt be like a watered garden,
and like a spring of water,
whose waters fail not."
Isaiah 58:11

Thank you, Trader Joe's!!

Have I mentioned before the great love I have for mochi ice cream?

Trader Joe's is the source of these delightful handheld ice creams. I highly recommend the strawberry :)

One of my favorite FREAKING people brought me the chocolate & the strawberry last night - woop woop!!

I just want to say

That it's good to be back !

Love After Love by Derek Walcott

The time will come
when, with elation,
you will greet yourself arriving
at your own door, in your own mirror,
and each will smile at the other's welcome,

And say, sit here. Eat.
You will love again the stranger who was yourself.
Give wine. Give bread. Give back your heart
to itself, to the stranger who has loved you

all your life, whom you ignored
for another, who knows you by heart.
Take down the love letters from the bookshelf,

the photographs, the desperate notes,
peel your own image from the mirror.
Sit. Feast on your life.

Anne Taintor

So, I have mixed feelings about Anne Taintor. She is pretty funny, and I like the way she brings some retro pop art back, but the cynical/bitter edge to her humor sometimes turns me off.

but then I think sometimes that she's just expressing what we are "too nice" to say :)

LOLCAT of the Day

I didn't use to think these "lolcats" were that funny. Maybe it's because I didn't grow up with pets, or this whole "online-speak" was kind of cryptic, but in the last year, they have started to get REALLY funny to me. As a result, I'm going to post some of my favorite ones periodically :)

And it begins...

My older sister Laura delivered

Bradley David "Brady" Lyle

around 10pm last night (May 8th, 2007)

Both mother and child are healthy.

He has Laura's hair (red), Brock's mouth, a cleft chin, and weighs 8 lbs, 6 oz. He is named for both of his Grandpas, Brad Lyle and David Thomas.

Here is a picture of the new family. My beautiful sister is now a mother - for mother's day:

It so happens

that I'm ba-a-a-ck :) expect some blog posts soon!

How adorable is my little sister?

I always take awkward pictures like these, but she looks adorable!!! I think it captures her personality - in that, the camera can't capture it!!

Here is a more posed, but equally cute, photo:



And here she is singing (or is that laughing?) with a mutual friend, Samantha.


Here's to charming sisters with cute noses and abundant personality!!

If You Forget Me by Pablo Neruda

I want you to know
one thing.

You know how this is:
if I look
at the crystal moon, at the red branch
of the slow autumn at my window,
if I touch
near the fire
the impalpable ash
or the wrinkled body of the log,
everything carries me to you,
as if everything that exists,
aromas, light, metals,
were little boats
that sail
toward those isles of yours that wait for me.

Well, now,
if little by little you stop loving me
I shall stop loving you little by little.

If suddenly
you forget me
do not look for me,
for I shall already have forgotten you.

If you think it long and mad,
the wind of banners
that passes through my life,
and you decide
to leave me at the shore
of the heart where I have roots,
remember
that on that day,
at that hour,
I shall lift my arms
and my roots will set off
to seek another land.

But
if each day,
each hour,
you feel that you are destined for me
with implacable sweetness,
if each day a flower
climbs up to your lips to seek me,
ah my love, ah my own,
in me all that fire is repeated,
in me nothing is extinguished or forgotten,
my love feeds on your love, beloved,
and as long as you live it will be in your arms
without leaving mine.

C.S. Lewis Quote #5

It is a serious thing to live in a society of possible gods and goddesses, to remember that the dullest and most uninteresting person you talk to may one day be a creature which, if you saw it now, you would be strongly tempted to worship, or else a horror and a corruption such as you now meet, if at all, only in a nightmare. All day long we are, in some degree, helping each other to one or other of these destinations. It is in the light of these overwhelming possibilities, it is with the awe and the circumspection proper to them, that we should conduct all our dealings with one another, all friendships, all loves, all play, all politics. There are no 'ordinary' people. You have never talked to a mere mortal. Nations, cultures, arts, civilisations -- these are mortal, and their life is to ours as the life of a gnat. But it is immortals whom we joke with, work with, marry, snub and exploit -- immortal horrors or everlasting splendours.

C.S. Lewis Quote #4

Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another, "What? You, too? I thought I was the only one."

C.S. Lewis Quote #3

Every time you make a choice you are turning the central part of you, the part that chooses, into something a little different from what it was before. And taking your life as a whole, with all your innumerable choices, all your life long you are slowly turning this central thing either into a heavenly creature or into a hellish creature: either into a creature that is in harmony with God, and with other creatures, and with itself, or else into one that is in a state of war and hatred with God, and with its fellow-creatures, and with itself. To be the one kind of creature is heaven: that is, it is joy and peace and knowledge and power. To be the other means madness, horror, idiocy, rage, impotence, and eternal loneliness. Each of us at each moment is progressing to the one state or the other.

C.S. Lewis Quote #2

A thing will not really live unless it first dies. It is simply no good trying to keep any thrill: that is the very worst thing you can do. Let the thrill go--let it die away--go on through that period of death into the quieter interest and happiness that follow--and you will find you are living in a world of new thrills all the time. But if you decide to make thrills your regular diet and try to prolong them artificially, they will all get weaker and weaker, and fewer and fewer, and you will be a bored, disillusioned old man for the rest of your life.

C.S. Lewis Quote #1

Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give it to no one, not even an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements. Lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket—safe, dark, motionless, airless—it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable.
To love is to be vulnerable.

Interesting Quiz

http://imagini.net/friends/

Celebration (1993) by Mari Evans

I will bring you a whole person

and you will bring me a whole person

and we will have us twice as much

of love and everything

I be bringing a whole heart

and while it do have nicks and

dents and scars,

that oly make me lay it down

more careful-like

An; you be bringing a whole heart

a little chipped and rusty an'

sometime skip a beat but

still an' all you bringing polish too

and look like you intend

to make it shine

And we be bringing, each of us

the music of ourselves to wrap

the other in

Forgiving clarities

Soft as a choir's last

lingering note our

personal blend

I will be bringing you someone whole

and you will be bringing me someone whole

and we be twice as strong

and we be twice as true

and we will have twice as much

of love

and everything

How Stuff Works: Women

Research into the differences in men's and women's brains also seemed to support the idea that men should be better at math. Men have 6.5 times more gray matter in their brains than women do. Women have 10 times more white matter. Gray matter creates processing centers in the brain, and white matter creates the connections between them. In other words, men have lots of areas for processing concrete data -- like mathematical equations -- and women have lots of connections that allow them to see and process patterns [Source: Live Science].

What do you think about this?

Your Catfish Friend by Richard Brautigan

If I were to live my life
in catfish forms
in scaffolds of skin and whiskers
at the bottom of a pond
and you were to come by
one evening
when the moon was shining
down into my dark home
and stand there at the edge
of my affection
and think, "It's beautiful
here by this pond. I wish
somebody loved me."
I'd love you and be your catfish
friend and drive such lonely
thoughts from your mind
and suddenly you would be
at peace,
and ask yourself, "I wonder
if there are any catfish
in this pond? It seems like
a perfect place for them."

Kansas is flatter than pancakes

http://www2.ljworld.com/news/2003/jul/27/holy_hotcakes_study/

Interesting Article

Tribal workers
Today's generation of high-earning professionals maintain that their personal fulfilment comes from their jobs and the hours they work. They should grow up, says Thomas Barlow.

Copyright The Financial Times Limited

A friend of mine recently met a young American woman who was studying on a Rhodes Scholarship at Oxford. She already had two degrees from top US universities, had worked as a lawyer and as a social worker in the US, and somewhere along the way had acquired a black belt in kung fu.

Now, however, her course at Oxford was coming to an end and she was thoroughly angst-ridden about what to do next.

Her problem was no ordinary one. She couldn't decide whether she should make a lot of money as a corporate lawyer/management consultant, devote herself to charity work helping battered wives in disadvantaged communities, or go to Hollywood to work as a stunt double in kung fu films.

What most struck my friend was not the disparity of this woman's choices, but the earnestness and bad grace with which she ruminated on them. It was almost as though she begrudged her own talents, opportunities and freedom - as though the world had treated her unkindly by forcing her to make such a hard choice.

Her case is symptomatic of our times. In recent years, there has grown up a culture of discontent among the highly educated young, something that seems to flare up, especially, when people reach their late 20s and early 30s. It arises not from frustration caused by lack of opportunity, as may have been true in the past, but from an excess of possibilities.

Most theories of adult developmental psychology have a special category for those in their late 20s and early 30s. Whereas the early to mid-20s are seen as a time to establish one's mode of living, the late 20s to early 30s are often considered a period of reappraisal.

In a society where people marry and have children young, where financial burdens accumulate early, and where job markets are inflexible, such reappraisals may not last long. But when people manage to remain free of financial or family burdens, and where the perceived opportunities for alternative careers are many, the reappraisal is likely to be angst-ridden and long lasting.

Among no social group is this more true than the modern, international, professional elite: that tribe of young bankers, lawyers, consultants and managers for whom financial, familial, personal, corporate and (increasingly) national ties have become irrelevant.

Often they grew up in one country, were educated in another, and are now working in a third. They are independent, well paid, and enriched by experiences that many of their parents could only dream of. Yet, by their late 20s, many carry a sense of disappointment: that for all their opportunities, freedoms and achievements, life has not delivered quite what they had hoped.

At the heart of this disillusionment lies a new attitude towards work. The idea has grown up, in recent years, that work should not be just a means to an end a way to make money, support a family, or gain social prestige - but should provide a rich and fulfilling experience in and of itself.

Jobs are no longer just jobs; they are lifestyle options.

Recruiters at financial companies, consultancies and law firms have promoted this conception of work. Job advertisements promise challenge, wide experiences, opportunities for travel and relentless personal development.

Michael is a 33-year-old management consultant who has bought into this vision of late-20th century work. Intelligent and well-educated - with three degrees, including a doctorate - he works in Munich, and has a "stable, long-distance relationship" with a woman living in California. He takes 140 flights a year and works an average of 80 hours a week. Some weeks he works more than 100 hours.

When asked if he likes his job, he will say: "I enjoy what I'm doing in terms of the intellectual challenges."

Although he earns a lot, he doesn't spend much. He rents a small apartment, though he is rarely there, and has accumulated very few possessions. He justifies the long hours not in terms of wealth-acquisition, but solely as part of a "learning experience".

This attitude to work has several interesting implications, mostly to do with the shifting balance between work and non-work, employment and leisure.

Because fulfilling and engrossing work - the sort that is thought to provide the most intense learning experience - often requires long hours or captivates the imagination for long periods of time, it is easy to slip into the idea that the converse is also true: that just by working long hours, one is also engaging in fulfilling and engrossing work.

This leads to the popular fallacy that you can measure the value of your job and, therefore, the amount you are learning from it) by the amount of time you spend on it. And, incidentally, when a premium is placed on learning rather than earning, people are particularly susceptible to this form of self-deceit.

Thus, whereas in the past, when people in their 20s or 30s spoke disparagingly about nine-to-five jobs it was invariably because they were seen as too routine, too unimaginative, or too bourgeois. Now, it is simply because they don't contain enough hours.

Young professionals have not suddenly developed a distaste for leisure, but they have solidly bought into the belief that a 45-hour week necessarily signifies an unfulfilling job.

Jane, a 29-year-old corporate lawyer who works in the City of London, tells a story about working on a deal with another lawyer, a young man in his early 30s. At about 3am, he leant over the boardroom desk and said: Isn't this great? This is when I really love my job."

What most struck her about the remark was that the work was irrelevant (she says it was actually rather boring); her colleague simply liked the idea of working late. "It's as though he was validated, or making his life important by this," she says.

Unfortunately, when people can convince themselves that all they need do in order to lead fulfilled and happy lives is to work long hours, they can quickly start to lose reasons for their existence.

As they start to think of their employment as a lifestyle, fulfilling and rewarding of itself - and in which the reward is proportional to hours worked - people rapidly begin to substitute work for other aspects of their lives.

Michael, the management consultant, is a good example of this phenomenon. He is prepared to trade (his word) not just goods and time for the experience afforded by his work, but also a substantial measure of commitment in his personal relationships. In a few months, he is being transferred to San Francisco, where he will move in with his girlfriend. But he's not sure that living in the same house is actually going to change the amount of time he spends on his relationship. "Once I move over, my time involvement on my relationship will not change significantly. My job takes up most of my time and pretty much dominates what I do, when, where and how I do it," he says.

Moreover, the reluctance to commit time to a relationship because they are learning so much, and having such an intense and fulfilling time at work is compounded, for some young professionals, by a reluctance to have a long-term relationship at all. Today, by the time someone reaches 30, they could easily have had three or four jobs in as many different cities - which is not, as it is often portrayed, a function of an insecure global job-market, but of choice.

Robert is 30 years old. He has three degrees and has worked on three continents. He is currently working for the United Nations in Geneva. For him, the most significant deterrent when deciding whether to enter into a relationship is the likely transient nature of the rest of his life.

"What is the point in investing all this emotional energy and exposing myself in a relationship, if I am leaving in two months, or if I do not know what I am doing next year?" he says.

Such is the character of the modern, international professional, at least throughout his or her 20s. Spare time, goods and relationships, these are all willingly traded for the exigencies of work. Nothing is valued so highly as accumulated experience. Nothing is neglected so much as commitment.

With this work ethic - or perhaps one should call it a professional development ethic" - becoming so powerful, the globally mobile generation now in its late 20s and early 30s has garnered considerable professional success.

At what point, though, does the experience-seeking end? Kathryn is a successful American academic, 29, who bucked the trend of her generation: she recently turned her life round for someone else. She moved to the UK, specifically, to be with a man, a decision that she says few of her contemporaries understood.

"We're not meant to say: 'I made this decision for this person. Today, you're meant to do things for yourself. If you're willing to make sacrifices for others - especially if you're a woman - that's seen as a kind of weakness. I wonder, though, is doing things for yourself really empowerment, or is liberty a kind of trap?" she says.

For many, it is a trap that is difficult to break out of, not least because they are so caught up in a culture of professional development. And spoilt for choice, some like the American Rhodes Scholar no doubt become paralysed by their opportunities, unable to do much else in their lives, because they are so determined not to let a single one of their chances slip.

If that means minimal personal commitments well into their 30s, so be it. "Loneliness is better than boredom" is Jane's philosophy. And, although she knows "a lot of professional single women who would give it all up if they met a "rich man to marry", she remains far more concerned herself about finding fulfilment at work.

"I am constantly questioning whether I am doing the right thing here," she says. "There's an eternal search for a more challenging and satisfying option, a better lifestyle. You always feel you're not doing the right thing, always feel as if you should be striving for another goal," she says.

Jane, Michael, Robert and Kathryn grew up as part of a generation with fewer social constraints determining their futures than has been true for probably any other generation in history. They were taught at school that when they grew up they could "do anything", "be anything". It was an idea that was reinforced by popular culture, in films, books and television.

The notion that one can do anything is clearly liberating. But life without constraints has also proved a recipe for endless searching, endless questioning of aspirations. It has made this generation obsessed with self-development and determined, for as long as possible, to minimise personal commitments in order to maximise the options open to them.

One might see this as a sign of extended adolescence. Eventually, they will be forced to realise that living is as much about closing possibilities as it is about creating them.

sorry for the lull

I've been OH-SO pleasantly distracted :)

Buttermilk Waffles

This is the waffle recipe I used at the Waffle Party.

Ingredients:
4 eggs, separated
4 c flour
1 T baking soda
1 t salt
1 cup oil
4 c buttermilk

Directions:
Combine dry ingredients, then add oil, buttermilk, & egg yolks. Whip egg whiltes (for fluffy batter) and fold into batter.

Birthday Waffles!

Come to my birthday party!!

On Saturday 10 February I threw a birthday waffle party - for myself.

The original was 4 years ago when I received a heart waffle iron from my mother for my birthday. It was a Wednesday night at BYU and my friend stopped by between 7 and 9 to eat waffles. My friend Natalie brought her mother's kitchen aid and buttermilk waffle recipe and we had some extra waffle irons - it was very memorable and I had thought about doing it again.

I decided 2007 is my year and it was time to do it again - but I decided to go big or go home. I bought 25 lbs of flour from Costco, five dozen eggs, and had 4 waffle irons cooking. We decorated the dining room with purple, red, and yellow streamers and the living room was full of 20 bright balloons. (ask me later about the balloons... there's a great story there.) I invited way too many people, but in the end they all fit in our house fine:

Some of my friends hijacked the kitchen so that I could mingle. They set up a pretty streamlined machine. Jes (not pictured), Jenna, and Tanya were major producers. (Note: the heart shaped waffle iron in the middle is mine):
Brad was also a big deal in the kitchen. He brought a retro/antique heart waffle iron that works on the stove (lessened risk of blowing a fuse) AND (like the balloons) it has a great story. He also issued special edition waffles by signing the paper plates (Note: that is my pink apron):

We had a plethora of toppings available: strawberries, bananas, nutella, jam, peanut butter, whipped cream, and, of course, gallons of maple syrup.

Even the guest list was big: my best friend from BYU Dave flew in from Arizona. My cousin Steve flew in from Seattle, and I timed it so that one of my best friends from DC Jocelyn would be there. My cousin Steve even volunteered to be the party photographer, which is why these pictures are so incredibly awesome. You can see the full set here.

The beautiful part of the party was not the waffles (although, as you can see, they were very beautiful):
But it was that I could see so many of my friends come together. I particularly enjoyed introducing them to each other. My family also came and I was delighted that they could meet so many of my friends.

Here are three people I love: my dad, my older sister Laura (beautiful at 6 months pregnant), and Dave. As you can see from their faces, waffles really do make the world a better place!
I wish you all could have been there!

Quote of the Day

How can you come to know yourself? Never by thinking, always by doing. Try to do your duty, and you'll know right away what you amount to. And what is your duty? Whatever the day calls for.
- Goethe

Perfect Love Casteth Out Fear

Motivating, transforming faith in Jesus Christ is like spiritual oxygen. As we allow faith to flow freely within us, it awakens and enlivens our spiritual senses. It breathes life into our very souls.

As faith flows, we become sensitively attuned to the whisperings of the Spirit. Our minds are enlightened, our spiritual pulse quickens, our hearts are touched.

Faith fuels hope. Our perspective changes; our vision becomes clearer. We begin to look for the best, not the worst, in life and in others. We gain a deeper sense of life's purpose and meaning. Despair gives way to joy.

Faith such as this is a heavenly gift, but it can be sought and cultivated. As our Bible Dictionary suggests, often "faith is kindled by hearing the testimony of those who have faith." Faith is then nurtured as we allow ourselves to believe. Like all other virtues, faith is strengthened as we practice it, as we live it, and act as if our faith were already deep. Faith is the product of righteous desire, belief, and obedience.

(Faith, Service, Constancy by Elder David S. Baxter)

So, in keeping with this idea of despair becoming joy - through the gospel of Jesus Christ - I read this scripture for the month of February and wanted to share it:

There is no fear in love; but perfect love casteth out fear. (1 John 4:18)

What a beautiful thought - a remonstrance, even - that we must build love for the Savior, for each other, and for the plan of salvation. And that by so doing we will let go of our fear of doing good, our fear of failure, our fears of life. When we love each other and teach each other to love the gospel and the life the Lord has given us, then we are also giving each other courage. For this is the gospel: hope, courage, gladness, and rejoicing, love instead of fear.

19 Now, what do we hear in the gospel which we have received? A voice of gladness! A voice of mercy from heaven; and a voice of truth out of the earth; glad tidings for the dead; a voice of gladness for the living and the dead; glad tidings of great joy. How beautiful upon the mountains are the feet of those that bring glad tidings of good things, and that say unto Zion: Behold, thy God reigneth! As the dews of Carmel, so shall the knowledge of God descend upon them!

22 Brethren, shall we not go on in so great a cause? Go forward and not backward. Courage , brethren; and on, on to the victory! Let your hearts rejoice, and be exceedingly glad. Let the earth break forth into singing . Let the dead speak forth anthems of eternal praise to the King Immanuel, who hath ordained, before the world was, that which would enable us to redeem them out of their prison; for the prisoners shall go free.

23 Let the mountains shout for joy, and all ye valleys cry aloud; and all ye seas and dry lands tell the wonders of your Eternal King! And ye rivers, and brooks, and rills, flow down with gladness. Let the woods and all the trees of the field praise the Lord; and ye solid rocks weep for joy! And let the sun, moon, and the morning stars sing together, and let all the sons of God shout for joy! And let the eternal creations declare his name forever and ever!
(Doctrine and Covenants 128)

Limerence

I thought this might be an interesting follow-up to my post on dating. Not related, really, but an interesting concept.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Limerence

Trigger Happy: Cell Phones

Seriously. So. Funny.

Billy Collins

One of my roommates from when I was at BYU sent me a Christmas present this year. She and I haven't spoken on the phone in years, so I was really touched that she sent this to me out of the blue.

She sent me a book of Billy Collins poetry, and while some of it is a little pretentious, I still found a number of poems I loved (I try not to let myself be biased by a little (or a lot) of pretense).

Here is one that you can sense a bit of it in:

Vade Mecum

I want the scissors to be sharp
and the table to be perfectly level
when you cut me out of my life
and paste me in that book you always carry.

but I still like it. And this one I thought was sweet:

The Dead

The dead are always looking down on us, they say,
while we are putting on our shoes or making a sandwich,
they are looking down through the glass-bottomed boats of heaven
as they row themselves through eternity.

They watch the tops of our heads moving below on earth,
and when we lie down in a field or on a couch,
drugged perhaps by the hum of a warm afternoon,
they think we are looking back at them,

which makes them lift their oars and fall silent
and wait, like parents, for us to close our eyes.

Quote of the Day

I kept as still as I could. Nothing happened. I did not expect anything to happen. I was something that lay under the sun and felt it, like the pumpkins, and I did not want to be anything more. I was entirely happy. Perhaps we feel like that when we die and become a part of something entire, whether it is sun and air, or goodness and knowledge. At any rate, that is happiness; to be dissolved into something complete and great. When it comes to one, it comes as naturally as sleep.
- Willa Cather, "My Antonia"

My thoughts on dating

In the last month or so I have finally been able to articulate my ideas of some of the key differences in the way men and women operate in dating. I'm posting them here at my roommate's request.

Women
For me, and for many women I know, my interest in specific men is very responsive. Much of my interest is influenced by (a) who spends time with me and invests in getting to know me, as well as (b) who demonstrates attraction / interest in me. The fact is, I may see a man that attracts me significantly, but it is the man who is coming around, who is calling me, who is taking an interest in me specifically, that I am giving my attention to, and who I am considering. I may not have interest initially, but I warm to him as he makes himself a part of my world. In the end, my dealbreakers may surface and the relationship may end, but when a man invests in me and my life, I will almost always start looking at him as a possibility. And so, I would say that for women, the key question is, "Who is in my world?" That is her answer of who she is more likely to develop significant interest in. I do not say that is who she is more likely to date, but it's who SHE, the woman, is more likely to develop attachment to.

What I take from this
A man should not be surprised if the women he spends time with want to date him. Even if up front a woman does not show any interest in him, she will warm to him (how much, how seriously, varies, but she will warm). I know it's not risky for him to hang out with girls platonically, but it is definitely risky for the women. Also, after a breakup, he really does need to remove himself from his ex-girlfriend's world so that she can move on. For women, it means we have to be much more cautious about who we give our time to. We have to recognize that if we don't want to date a man, we really shouldn't give him the time of day. Or, if we decide to give him a chance, we need to recognize and accept that we may change our minds, which I think can be a good thing, too :) And women need to cut the cord with the men they break up with or know it's not going anywhere with. Keeping them in your world is not going to help you find someone else.

Men
Men, on the other hand, have an interesting phenomenon from the very beginning. After a certain amount of exposure (and it doesn't take much), they know definitively whether or not a woman is in their list of "eligible" women to date. And what I mean is, all women are either eligible or ineligible. Ineligible meaning that they are an unequivocable "NO" and that there is nothing that the woman (or the man, for that matter) can do to make her eligible. A woman who is not on the man's list of eligible women, can flirt, can encourage, can even have a brilliant connection with a man, but he will not consider her with serious interest. He may even date her or marry her, but usually he will drop her before she can wear him down to that point. He may even acknowledge to himself that this woman would be a great fit "on paper" - but she is not in the eligible group and so she will never really have a hold on him.

It is important to note that eligibility is not purely driven by appearance. In fact, men cannot really give a rationale for why one woman is and another isn't. They feel very awkward and don't know how to explain it, but they know that it is true. No amount of exposure or bonding with a woman can change her categorization - which women have a particularly hard time understanding, being that we are the complete opposite. Women cannot understand how a man, after getting to know us and being quite intimate with us, can still have absolutely no interest.

However, just because a woman is on the eligible list, it doesn't mean that she is a shoe-in. But it does mean that this is where she can act - with a very good chance of results. When a woman is eligible, it means that she is "datable" - she is someone to whom the man will be responsive, in the way that women are more generally responsive. If she flirts, encourages, banters, and pays attention to him, she is not wasting her time. He may not respond (for a variety of reasons), but she is not wasting her time like she is with a man for whom she is not eligible.

I have noticed that for a man, those (eligible) women who are encouraging and flirting and attentive seem to "rise in the queue" in his mind and interest - they are the ones that he is thinking about and focusing on. So it is key for a woman to be very responsive if she is interested. A woman may be eligible for a man, but if she isn't doing anything, he will end up paying his attention to someone else who is.

What I take from this
To me, this is really a relief - I at least feel like I know what I have control over and what I don't have control over. All I have to do is identify which men I am eligible for, and those are the ones I need to invest in and encourage. I find it very satisfying when I can tell I am of interest to a man (sometimes I have significant interest also, sometimes I don't, but it's always satisfying to know!) and I try to be more philsophical about the men whose list I am not on. I always assume I am not eligible for men who give me no signals. It can be somewhat discouraging if I'm not really feeling like I am on anyone's list, but I find it comforting that at least I am not wasting my time on them.

Also, what this means to me is that it is ridiculous for me to hang out a lot with a man hoping that he will come around and fall for me. If he hasn't already, then it's most likely I am not eligible and never will be. Basically, I am the one at risk because I will probably fall for him as he continues to be in my world - and yet I will never get any results.

So I'm interested to hear what you think - if this rings true to you. It makes sense with my experiences in dating and from what I've observed from my male friends.

As honey for sweetness

And [the angel] said unto me, son of man, cause thy belly to eat, and fill thy bowels with this roll that I give thee. Then did I eat it; and it was in my mouth as honey for sweetness. Ezekiel 3:3

What a beautiful image! Before Ezekiel could go preach to Israel, he had to eat of the word of God. He had to study the scriptures. I love the description of the taste - "as honey for sweetness." It reminds me of the tree of life in Lehi's / Nephi's vision. Both the sweetness of the scriptures, as described by Ezekiel, and the sweetness of the tree of life, from Lehi's vision, are sweetened by the only thing that satisfies: the love of God.

We must eat and fill ourselves with the scriptures we have been given. The sweetness of the scriptures will nourish us when we are weary. They will "satisfy thy soul in drought and make fat thy bones: and thou shalt be like a watered garden, and like a spring of water, whose waters fail not." (Isaiah 58:11)

AMAZING!

That's what my world looks like right now. With or without the glasses.

Improving Our Prayers

Excerpt from this talk by Elder Joseph B. Wirthlin

A Pattern for Prayer

In Psalm 37 [Ps. 37] David revealed an inspired process for active prayer and faith. It is a step-by-step process that may serve as a pattern for us to follow as we seek to increase our faith and improve the efficacy of our prayers.

1."Fret not" (see Ps. 37:1). To fret means to worry or to brood about something. The first thing we must do is stop worrying. When we worry about the future, we create unhappiness in the present. Righteous concern may lead us to take appropriate action, but worrying about things we cannot control can paralyze and demoralize us. Instead of worrying, focus on doing all that you can, and then leave the worrying to your Heavenly Father. If your heart is right with Him, He will take care of the worry and the fear. We must learn to "fret not."

2. "Trust in the Lord" (see Ps. 37:3). Why should we trust in Him? Because He is our loving and all-wise Father in Heaven. Because He is the giver of all good gifts. Because He knows us and wants us to be happy and successful and to return to Him. God is in His heaven. He is perfect. He loves us. "Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding," we read in the scriptures. "In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths" (Prov. 3:5–6).

3. "Do good" (see Ps. 37:3). We do good because we are followers of Christ. We do good because we are members of His church. We do good because we have made solemn covenants to serve as a light unto the world. Our Heavenly Father expects our actions to serve as a living testimony to our words. As we do good, the Lord can bless our efforts. This is not to say that we must never make a mistake, "for all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God" ( Rom. 3:23). The Lord requires that we seek Him with a humble heart, that we repent of our sins, and that we continue to do the best we can. As we make mistakes, we should learn from them and strive not to repeat them. As we do so, we become ever more Christlike, ever more as men and women of God. As our actions contradict our professions of faith, our prayers become weak. When we do good, the Lord can work through us and magnify our efforts.

4. "Delight thyself also in the Lord" (see Ps. 37:4). What a wonderful doctrine! Instead of worrying or grumbling that our prayers have gone unanswered, we should delight ourselves in the Lord. Be grateful. Be happy. Know that the Lord, in His time, will bring about all your righteous desires—sometimes in ways we predict, sometimes in ways we could not have possibly foreseen. What a wonderful recipe for happiness and peace.

5. "Commit thy way unto the Lord" (see Ps. 37:5). No matter what your worries are, commit yourself to keeping His commandments. Brethren, honor your priesthood. Sisters, cleave unto the principles of light and truth.

6. "Rest in the Lord" (see Ps. 37:7). Sometimes the hardest thing we can do is wait. The Lord has His own timetable, and although it may frustrate us, His timing is always perfect. When we rest in the Lord, we allow Him to work His will for us in His own time and in His own way.

Christmas in Melville

We had our Christmas celebration Saturday 6 January (which appropriately was also Epiphany or Three Kings Day) as roommates here at Melville.

You can read my roommate Sarah's blog post on it here. (The link includes recipes for the pear/gingerbread pudding and I also posted a comment on how to prepare the pork loin).

We awoke in our pajamas and had Christmas presents downstairs. We had a new coffee table from Santa, and each of us had a single gift, from an assigned roommate. In addition to the individual's gift, there was a house gift from each roommate.

Individual Gifts
Reija (from Michelle): a Ph.D Survival kit, which included polka-dot pajamas, a white Banana Republic blouse, the most recent issue of the Economist, 2 butterfly drinking glasses (for egg nog & OJ), and Mega M&Ms
Karren (from Sarah): silver earrings and green/white polka-dot shoes
Michelle (from Karren): bottle of scent (Charmer, from Anthropologie), Wit & Wisdom of Jane Austen (book), and four white drawer pulls for Michelle's linen closet/dresser (which up to this point has had an assortment of mismatched and even chipped knobs.
Sarah (from Reija): large wooden jewelry case (three levels high) with green/white polka-dot lining (it looked remarkably similar to the shoes Sarah gave me...)

We agreed that polka-dots are the new black... or so it would appear from the number of polka-dot'ed items in our collection.

House Gifts
Reija: curtains for the Mud Room Door, Dining Room windows, and Kitchen windows
Karren: placemats in slate blue, green, & grey
Michelle: picture frames
Sarah: curtain rods for the curtains given by Reija, a metal strainer
Santa: coffee table (large, wood, beautiful)

Press Release: Ring out the Maxima, Ring in the Camry

Since the Maxima died in the car Accident on 20 December (1pm ish), I had to get a new car. My dad and I went to the Stevens Creek Toyota and I watched as my dad negotiated my very first car purchase.

I bought a 2007 Toyota Camry (white, of course). This is a generic photo, I will try to get pics soon (my camera is borked).

Passers-by by Carl Sandburg

Passers-by,
Out of your many faces
Flash memories to me
Now at the day end
Away from the sidewalks
Where your shoe soles traveled
And your voices rose and blent
To form the city's afternoon roar
Hindering an old silence.

Passers-by,
I remember lean ones among you,
Throats in the clutch of a hope,
Lips written over with strivings,
Mouths that kiss only for love,
Records of great wishes slept with,
Held long
And prayed and toiled for:

Yes,
Written on
Your mouths
And your throats
I read them
When you passed by.

From Chicago Poems.

Merry Christmas from California

Press Release: TODAY IS THE LAST DAY

at my current job. I'm pretty darn excited. I packed up my cubicle in Chicago yesterday and flew home last night. I am just wrapping up loose ends today. woot!

Stranger than Fiction

I have already seen it twice, and while it's not the finest movie I have seen, neither it is it the most pretentious. It is a simple, dear story. I highly recommend it.

Although it is a comedy, Will Ferrell is not in his normal comedic role.

Also, check out the soundtrack featuring Spoon and my new favorite "Whole Wide World" by Wreckless Eric.

2 Nephi 26:24-25

He doeth not anything save it be for the benefit of the world; for he loveth the world, even that he layeth down his own life that he may draw all men unto him. Wherefore, he commandeth none that they shall not partake of his salvation.

Behold, doth he cry unto any, saying: Depart from me? Behold, I say unto you, Nay; but he saith: Come unto me all ye ends of the earth, buy milk and honey, without money and without price.

It's like love

I just bought this poster:

Changes

Just a note for those of you I haven't talked to. I just quit my current job to take a new job in a position local to the Bay Area (San Mateo, to be exact) I will finish up my current job on December 18th and start my new job on the 28th. This means:

- No more commuting to Chicago (i.e. 100% in CA except for occasional business travel)
- Less stressful consulting culture / lifestyle
- More money

It also means fewer vacation days a year, but I'm willing to compromise on something :)

If you want more details, give me a call or email me and I'll fill you in.

When you marry into our family

You can expect babies like this

Chubby cheeks mean the baby is loved in all the right ways.

I'm on vacation today

but I'm still working.

And while I'm working, I'm listening to this.

Quote of the Day

"Slowly crossing the deck from the scuttle, Ahab leaned over the side and watched how his shadow in the water sank and sank to his gaze, the more and the more that he strove to pierce the profundity. But the lovely aromas in that enchanted air did at last seem to dispel, for a moment, the cankerous thing in his soul. That glad, happy air, that winsome sky, did at last stroke and caress him; the step-mother world, so long cruel--forbidding--now threw affectionate arms round his stubborn neck, and did seem to joyously sob over him, as if over one, that however wilful and erring, she could yet find it in her heart to save and to bless. From beneath his slouched hat Ahab dropped a tear into the sea; nor did all the Pacific contain such wealth as that one wee drop."
Herman Melville, Moby Dick

The Melville Poems: Ode to SO

First peeping, peering round my door
now pontificating on my bed
the brilliance I have found
is bold
and dark
and wears
the slippers that I gave her
as she trips and slips about the wooden floors
of Melville

The Melville Poems: Ode to RM

Find her in the nook
pretty shoes, curling hair
Find her in the lab
tending cells, lamenting time
Find her alone at Melville
spreading peanut butter and
singing joyously to the bread

The Melville Poems: Ode to MH

Fresh golden sunshine
smiles, attends her as she runs
leading her back to Melville

The Melville Poems: Untitled

The Austen-esque book
will chronicle our affairs
real and imagined

Reija's pretty prose
reads with quips and quibbles quaint
what a silly scene

Find the Melville House
Forever immortalized
just like Patty's Place

Qué llegue el viernes ya!!!

2 Nephi 8 (or, Trust)

"I am he; yea I am he that comforteth you. Behold, who art thou, that thou shouldst be afraid of man, who shall die ... and forgettest the Lord thy maker, that hath stretched forth the heavens, and laid the foundations of the earth?

"Fear ye not the reproach of men, neither be ye afraid of their revilings.
For the moth shall eat them up like a garment, and the worm shall eat them like wool. But my righteousness shall be forever, and my salvation from generation to generation.

"For the Lord shall comfort Zion, he will comfort all her waste places; and he will make her wilderness like Eden, and her desert like the garden of the Lord. Joy and gladness shall be found therein, thanksgiving and the voice of melody.

"And on my arm shall they trust."

How do we exhibit fear of mean and their revilings? Is our hope in the Lord? Are we more upset and fearful over our diligence in daily prayer, scripture study, and being kind to others, or are we more concerned about finances, work, and deadlines? While we should do our duty in worldly affairs, we should fear God more than man.

The Lord will comfort us and all of our waste places. He will make our weaknesses strengths. Anything in us that is a wilderness or a desert the Lord will make as beautiful and lush as a garden. We can have great hope and happiness in our Savior.

Doctrine and Covenants 3

7 For, behold, you should not have feared man more than God. Although men set at naught the counsels of God, and despise his words—
8 Yet you should have been faithful; and he would have extended his arm and supported you against all the fiery darts of the adversary; and he would have been with you in every time of trouble.

(Untitled) by Sharon Creech

Sometimes
when you are trying
not to think about something
it keeps popping back
into your head
you can’t help it
you think about it
and
think about it
and
think about it
until your brain
feels like
a squashed pea.

From Blossoms by Li-Young Lee

From blossoms comes
this brown paper bag of peaches
we bought from the joy
at the bend in the road where we turned toward
signs painted Peaches.

From laden boughs, from hands,
from sweet fellowship in the bins,
comes nectar at the roadside, succulent
peaches we devour, dusty skin and all,
comes the familiar dust of summer, dust we eat.

O, to take what we love inside,
to carry within us an orchard, to eat
not only the skin, but the shade,
not only the sugar, but the days, to hold
the fruit in our hands, adore it, then bite into
the round jubilance of peach.

There are days we live
as if death were nowhere
in the background; from joy
to joy to joy, from wing to wing,
from blossom to blossom to
impossible blossom, to sweet impossible blossom.

Rain by Jack Gilbert

Suddenly this defeat.
This rain.
The blues gone grey
And the browns gone grey
And yellow
A terrible amber.
In the cold streets
Your warm body.
In whatever room
Your warm body.
Among all the people
Your absence
The people who are always
Not you.

I have been easy with trees
Too long.
Too familiar with mountains.
Joy has been a habit.
Now
Suddenly
This rain.

Word of the Day

quagmire
noun
a difficult, precarious, or entrapping position: predicament

Google Define here.

The Riddle of the World by Alexander Pope

Know then thyself, presume not God to scan;
The proper study of Mankind is Man.
Plac'd on this isthmus of a middle state,
A being darkly wise, and rudely great:
With too much knowledge for the Sceptic side,
With too much weakness for the Stoic's pride,
He hangs between; in doubt to act, or rest,
In doubt to deem himself a God, or Beast;
In doubt his Mind or Body to prefer,
Born but to die, and reas'ning but to err,
Alike in ignorance, his reason such,
Whether he thinks too little, or too much:
Chaos of Thought and Passion, all confus'd;
Still by himself abus'd, or disabus'd;
Created half to rise,and half to fall;
Great lord of all things, yet a prey to all;
Sole judge of Truth, in endless error hurl'd:
The glory, jest and riddle of the world!