(today is)

moving day!

(it's true: I'm moving from Melville today)

How You Can Help

As some of you know, last week my cousin Christian and his wife Stephanie Nielson were in a very serious private plane crash. They are a young couple (Stephanie is my age) with four children under the age of six. It has been a very emotional time for my family, but we have felt tremendous support from our LDS faith and from wonderful friends.

Christian and Stephanie are still in critical condition and because Stephanie has third degree burns covering 80% of her body and Christian has third degree burns over 30% of his body, their recovery will be very long and very expensive (into the millions).

Today, several websites of friends, family, and others who are deeply concerned about the Nielsons are auctioning off items for their benefit. There are some really beautiful things for sale and all of the proceeds (in some cases, a portion) go to the recovery fund for the Nielsons.

You can see the comprehensive list here: http://www.designmom.com/
or donate directly here: http://www.nierecovery.com/

You can read updates about Stephanie and Christian here (written by Stephanie's sister Courtney): http://blog.cjanerun.com/
Stephanie has long blogged about her little family here: http://nieniedialogues.blogspot.com

Please feel free to forward this to others who either know Stephanie & Christian or who may be into online shopping :) (There really are some beautiful things for sale! - Many handmade items).

Love
kt

Believe Me, If All These Endearing Young Charms by Thomas Moore

Believe me, if all those endearing young charms
Which I gaze on so fondly today
Were to change by tomorrow and fleet in my arms
Like fairy gifts fading away,
Thou wouldst still be adored as this moment thou art
Let thy loveliness fade as it will
And around the dear ruin each wish of my heart
Would entwine itself verdantly still.

It is not while beauty and youth are thine own
And thy cheeks unprofaned by a tear
That the fervor and faith of a soul can be known
To which time will but make thee more dear.
No, the heart that has truly loved never forgets
But as truly loves on to the close
As the sunflower turns to her God when he sets
The same look which she turned when he rose.

Quote of the Day

The longer I live the more beautiful life becomes.
Frank Lloyd Wright

1 Corinthians 3: 8-15

Now every man shall receive his own reward according to his own labour.
For we are labourers together with God: ye are God’s husbandry, ye are God’s building.
According to the grace of God which is given unto me, as a wise masterbuilder, I have laid the foundation, and another buildeth thereon. But let every man take heed how he buildeth thereupon.
For other foundation can no man lay than that is laid, which is Jesus Christ.
Now if any man build upon this foundation gold, silver, precious stones, wood, hay, stubble;
Every man’s work shall be made manifest: for the day shall declare it, because it shall be revealed by fire; and the fire shall try every man’s work of what sort it is.
If any man’s work abide which he hath built thereupon, he shall receive a reward.
If any man’s work shall be burned, he shall suffer loss: but he himself shall be saved; yet so as by fire.

A side note

Although I usually just blog quotes, poems, and the occasional lolcat, I do read a number of blogs on fashion and style that I really enjoy. One of them is having a contest to find accessories for her wedding dress and another is having a haiku contest around stila cosmetics. I thought I would post my submissions here for fun and to satiate my interests in fashion and style without dedicating my blog to it (Altho, maybe that will change ... )

To Halve and Halve Not

I am halving my possessions and moving on Friday into a modest studio apartment.

I am excited to own less.

I am interested to see how I like living alone.

(I hope I can fit self and self's stuff in there...)

ps - some things I have given away in efforts to shed stuff: (not an exclusive list)
ice cream maker
board games
sleeping bags (2)
suitcases
pillows
books
books
books

pps - I have to sell my queen size bed *sniff* (it simply won't fit in the new place)

Heavy by Mary Oliver

The time
I thought I could not
go any closer to grief
without dying

I went closer
and I did not die.
Surely God
had His hand in this,

as well as friends,
Still, I was bent,
and my laughter,
as the poet said,

was nowhere to be found.
Then said my friend Daniel
(brave even among lions),
"It's not the weight you carry

but how you carry it--
books, bricks, grief--
it's all in the way
you embrace it, balance it, carry it

when you cannot, and would not,
put it down."
So I went practicing.
Have you noticed?

Have you heard the laughter
that comes, now and again,
out of my startled mouth?

How I linger
to admire, admire, admire
the things of this world
that are kind, and maybe

also troubled--
roses in the wind,
the sea geese on the steep wave,
a love
to which there is no reply?

Isaiah 54:7-8

For a small moment have I forsaken thee, but with great mercies will I gather thee. In a little wrath I hid my face for a moment; but with everlasting kindness will I have mercy on thee, saith the Lord thy Redeemer.

Daisies by Mary Oliver

It is possible, I suppose that sometime
we will learn everything
there is to learn: what the world is, for example,
and what it means. I think this as I am crossing
from one field to another, in summer, and the
mockingbird is mocking me, as one who either
knows enough already or knows enough to be
perfectly content not knowing. Song being born
of quest he knows this: he must turn silent
were he suddenly assaulted with answers. Instead
oh hear his wild, caustic, tender warbling ceaselessly
unanswered. At my feet the white-petalled daisies display
the small suns of their center piece, their - if you don't
mind my saying so - their hearts. Of course
I could be wrong, perhaps their hearts are pale and
narrow and hidden in the roots. What do I know?
But this: it is heaven itself to take what is given,
to see what is plain; what the sun lights up willingly;
for example - I think this
as I reach down, not to pick but merely to touch -
the suitability of the field for the daisies, and the
daisies for the field.

Babyhood

Dad's First Birdy

We had a rough weekend as a family, and so my brother-in-law Brock took my dad out golfing tonight to take his mind off of things.

Brock's idea turned out to be completely inspired - because on the 16th hole Dad hit his first birdy ever! Here he is about to finish it off :)

Sunday Will Come by Elder Joseph B. Wirthlin

[My wife Elisa] was my strength and my joy. Because of her, I am a better man, husband, and father. We married, had eight children, and walked together through 65 years of life.

When President Hinckley spoke at Sister Wirthlin’s funeral, he said that it is a devastating, consuming thing to lose someone you love. It gnaws at your soul. He was right. As Elisa was my greatest joy, her passing is my greatest sorrow.

In the lonely hours I have spent a great deal of time thinking about eternal things. I have contemplated the comforting doctrines of eternal life.

I think of how dark that Friday was when Christ was lifted up on the cross. I think that of all the days since the beginning of this world’s history, that Friday was the darkest.

But the doom of that day did not endure.

The despair did not linger because on Sunday, the resurrected Lord burst the bonds of death. He ascended from the grave and appeared gloriously triumphant as the Savior of all mankind.

Each of us will have our own Fridays—those days when the universe itself seems shattered and the shards of our world lie littered about us in pieces. We all will experience those broken times when it seems we can never be put together again. We will all have our Fridays.

But I testify to you in the name of the One who conquered death—Sunday will come. In the darkness of our sorrow, Sunday will come.

No matter our desperation, no matter our grief, in this life or the next, Sunday will come.

We will all rise from the grave. On that day I will once again hold in my arms my beloved Elisa.

Because of the life and eternal sacrifice of the Savior of the world, we will be reunited with those we have cherished. On that day we will know the love of our Heavenly Father and will rejoice that the Messiah overcame all that we could live forever.

Because of the sacred ordinances we receive in holy temples, death cannot long separate relationships that have been fastened together with cords made of eternal ties.

No matter how dark our Friday, Sunday will come.

Read the full talk here.

Valentine for Ernest Mann by Naomi Shihab Nye

You can't order a poem like you order a taco.
Walk up to the counter, say, "I'll take two"
and expect it to be handed back to you
on a shiny plate.

Still, I like your spirit.
Anyone who says, "Here's my address,
write me a poem," deserves something in reply.
So I'll tell you a secret instead:
poems hide. In the bottoms of our shoes,
they are sleeping. They are the shadows
drifting across our ceilings the moment
before we wake up. What we have to do
is live in a way that lets us find them.

Once I knew a man who gave his wife
two skunks for a valentine.
He couldn't understand why she was crying.
"I thought they had such beautiful eyes."
And he was serious. He was a serious man
who lived in a serious way. Nothing was ugly
just because the world said so. He really
liked those skunks. So, he re-invented them
as valentines and they became beautiful.
At least, to him. And the poems that had been hiding
in the eyes of skunks for centuries
crawled out and curled up at his feet.

Maybe if we re-invent whatever our lives give us
we find poems. Check your garage, the odd sock
in your drawer, the person you almost like, but not quite.
And let me know.

Update

Hundreds were fasting for Christian and Stephanie today. It is so great to know that love and faith - made manifest through prayers and fasting - have such a healing power. That God lets us manifest our love in such a way to help each other heal.

Stephanie and Christian have been taken out of trauma, but are still in critical condition. Our family is much more hopeful with tonight's update and know that the progress they have made has been to the credit of their physicians, the faithful prayers and fasting of friends and family, and Stephanie's and Christian's love of and desires to be with their family. We are humbled by the outpouring of love and faith we have felt. Truly this has been a time to turn our hearts to God and to our family.

I know that though this will be an ongoing healing process for Stephanie and Christian, that for them to bear these burdens together will be a great mercy.

I am so grateful to have temple covenants that bind me to my family - and to such wonderful extended family as the Nielsons. They are very dear to me.

I am also grateful for friends and family who strengthen each other with faith, such as Stephanie's dear friend Reachel.

Thank you for your prayers. Please continue to remember Christian and Stephanie. I know that it will bless them as they heal.

Morning Poem by Mary Oliver

Every morning
the world
is created.
Under the orange

sticks of the sun
the heaped
ashes of the night
turn into leaves again

and fasten themselves to the high branches ---
and the ponds appear
like black cloth
on which are painted islands

of summer lilies.
If it is your nature
to be happy
you will swim away along the soft trails

for hours, your imagination
alighting everywhere.
And if your spirit
carries within it

the thorn
that is heavier than lead ---
if it's all you can do
to keep on trudging ---

there is still
somewhere deep within you
a beast shouting that the earth
is exactly what it wanted ---

each pond with its blazing lilies
is a prayer heard and answered
lavishly,
every morning,

whether or not
you have ever dared to be happy,
whether or not
you have ever dared to pray.

Tragedy

Some of you may know of the private plane crash that my cousin Christian and his wife Stephanie were in on Saturday. They are in critical condition in the Arizona Burn Center. Please join us in praying and fasting for them. You can read updates on Stephanie's sister's blog here.

Enduring Together by Bishop Richard C. Edgley

From bearing one another’s burdens as ward members, we have learned several lessons:

1. The Lord’s organization is fully adequate to know and care for those with even the most dire emotional and spiritual needs.

2. Adversity can bring us closer to God, with a renewed and enlightened appreciation for prayer and the Atonement, which covers pain and suffering in all their manifestations.

3. Members who suffer tragedy firsthand often experience an increased capacity for love, compassion, and understanding. They become the first, last, and often the most effective responders in giving comfort and showing compassion to others.

4. A ward, as well as a family, draws closer together as it endures together—what happens to one happens to all.

5. And perhaps most important, we can each be more compassionate and caring because we have each had our own personal trials and experiences to draw from. We can endure together.

I rejoice in belonging to such a loving and caring organization. No one knows better how to bear one another’s burdens, mourn with those who mourn, and comfort those who stand in need of comfort. I choose to call it “enduring together.” What happens to one happens to all. We endure together.

Read the full talk here.

The only time in my life I've worn glasses

Sunrise by Mary Oliver

You can
die for it-
an idea,
or the world. People
have done so,
brilliantly,
letting
their small bodies be bound
to the stake,
creating
an unforgettable
fury of light. But
this morning,
climbing the familiar hills
in the familiar
fabric of dawn, I thought
of China,
and India
and Europe, and I thought
how the sun
blazes
for everyone just
so joyfully
as it rises
under the lashes
of my own eyes, and I thought
I am so many!
What is my name?
What is the name
of the deep breath I would take
over and over
for all of us? Call it
whatever you want, it is
happiness, it is another one
of the ways to enter
fire.

I love this boy

The Melville Pantry

If you want an insight into my roommates and Melville, this one is pretty great.

Quote of the Day

"I took apart a HP laptop, and it was made of components (transistors, capacitors, circuit board, gold linings and such), you know, the boring usual result of the miniturisation process. When I took apart a Mac, I stumbled upon a world was full of little elves and unicorns who were playing on rolling green hills surrounded by snow-tipped mountains and fields of beautiful flowers that danced in the wind like a Russian ballereena. There was also a rainbow or two there as well.
The HP laptop was surprisingly a little bit heavier, but that's to be expected. Mactops were sprinkled with faerie dust for taking off most of the weight."

slashdot

Young Sea by Carl Sandburg

The sea is never still.
It pounds on the shore
Restless as a young heart,
Hunting.

The sea speaks
And only the stormy hearts
Know what it says:
It is the face
of a rough mother speaking.

The sea is young.
One storm cleans all the hoar
And loosens the age of it.
I hear it laughing, reckless.

They love the sea,
Men who ride on it
And know they will die
Under the salt of it

Let only the young come,
Says the sea.

Let them kiss my face
And hear me.
I am the last word
And I tell
Where storms and stars come from.

Quote of the Day

You need kissing, badly. That's what's wrong with you. You should be kissed and often, and by someone who knows how.

Rhett Butler, Gone with the Wind

iTunes Playlist

My Favourite Book (Stars)
(What A) Wonderful World (Sam Cooke)
Love of my Life (Queen)
How Deep is Your Love (The Bird and the Bee)
A Thousand Tiny Pieces (Sean Hayes)
Love me like the World is Ending (Ben Lee)
You are the Sunshine of my Life (Stevie Wonder)

LOLCAT of the Day

Romans 8:38-39

For I am persuaded, that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come, nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Waking from Sleep by Robert Bly

Inside the veins there are navies setting forth
Tiny explosions at the water lines
And seagulls weaving in the wind of the salty blood.

It is the morning. The country has slept the whole winter.
Window seats were covered with fur skins the yard was full
Of stiff dogs and hands that clumsily held heavy books.

Now we wake and rise from bed and eat breakfast!-
Shouts rise from the harbor of the blood
Mist and masts rising the knock of wooden tackle in the sunlight.

Now we sing and do tiny dances on the kitchen floor.
Our whole body is like a harbor at dawn;
We know that our master has left us for the day.

Quote of the Day

There is one virtue, attribute, or principle, which, if cherished and practised by the Saints, would prove salvation to thousands upon thousands. I allude to charity, or love, from which proceed forgiveness, long-suffering, kindness, and patience.

Brigham Young, JD 7:133 34

The Silken Tent by Robert Frost

She is as in a field a silken tent
At midday when the sunny summer breeze
Has dried the dew and all its ropes relent,
So that in guys it gently sways at ease,
And its supporting central cedar pole,
That is its pinnacle to heavenward
And signifies the sureness of the soul,
Seems to owe naught to any single cord,
But strictly held by none, is loosely bound
By countless silken ties of love and thought
To every thing on earth the compass round,
And only by one's going slightly taut
In the capriciousness of summer air
Is of the slightest bondage made aware.

Under the Harvest Moon by Carl Sandburg

Under the harvest moon,
When the soft silver
Drips shimmering
Over the garden nights,
Death, the gray mocker,
Comes and whispers to you
As a beautiful friend
Who remembers.

Under the summer roses
When the flagrant crimson
Lurks in the dusk
Of the wild red leaves,
Love, with little hands,
Comes and touches you
With a thousand memories,
And asks you
Beautiful, unanswerable questions.

Doctrine & Covenants 46:30

He that asketh in the Spirit asketh according to the will of God.

Flashback: Mom