I had been working long hours, traveling for business, teaching a summer institute course (including writing my own lesson plans), teaching gospel doctrine, and tutoring. I had finished my third move for the year and had just returned from a trip to Europe. I was burned out.
I have always struggled with giving myself alone time and not over-committing myself. I have also always struggled with exercising regularly. I felt that perhaps these two things were connected. I wasn't prioritizing exercise enough because I was crowding it out with other things.
I remembered a church conference address that had given counsel to parents to not structure their kids' schedules too much and I realized that if I couldn't do that for myself now, then I couldn't expect to do it for my (theoretical) kids.
I spent much of the summer trying to change and found it extremely challenging. I decided I had to retrench socially to get my life in order. Many of my friends were concerned that I wasn't prioritizing my social life (I was, after all 27!) but I knew that I needed to slow myself down. I felt good about skipping social activities to attend my yoga class and go to bed early.
In August, when my home teachers asked me if they could do anything to help me, I confided that I was struggling to find a way to run regularly. I told them I had always struggled with making time to exercise - and now I was concerned because it was starting to get dark and that was just another barrier to overcome.
My home teacher Nathan suggested that I just do what I could each day - even if it's just a 5 minute walk or jog. My home teacher Bruce, the quieter of the two, offered to run with me.
I was pleased with both of their answers - and promptly accepted Bruce's offer to go running together. We ran the next evening in the baylands.
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Postscripts
--------Bruce's motives
I felt instinctively that Bruce's offer to run with me was not an attempt to pursue me, but just a way to help me and at the same time be more physically active himself. I felt that and so I trusted him. I had never run with a man before (nor had any desire to), but I felt at ease with him.
(By the way, Bruce confirmed later that he really did just want to run to help in his training to hike Mt. Rainier. HA! I was right!)
How this changed me
I know I would not have had time for a relationship prior to giving myself more unstructured time. I might have made formal dates a priority, but I simply would have been too busy for the casual shared time that is required to build the friendship that should be the foundation of any strong relationship.
Next installment here.
3 comments:
I still think BC is holding out...I know it was because of your spiritual and physical swagger. ;)
I remember talking to Bruce on the phone when you guys started running together and I asked him if he had been on any dates and he said no, but went running with a girl. I think he may have been training for Rainier, but he was also seeing if he liked you. And obviously he did.
Yeah, he actually admits that when he went with me to a soccer game in April 2009 he wanted to put his arm around me (but didn't because he didn't really know me). hehehe.
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